Friday, 2 August 2024 ------------------------ Hello. All is well. God is love. I believe I've cooked something edible. Better serve it before it gets cold. I should keep a notebook at hand when I'm walking. I seem to forget a few things that could be useful to remember. Walking, for me, is an intentional dance between acting self and thinking self. There's nothing inherently wrong about thinking. It should simply not be misused, which, of course, requires competence. In short, don't get lost in thought. I realize I repeat myself in my writing, but that's because, for me, it's necessary to work things out. I have made a mistake in my use of words for my III model, specifically, thinking self. This should rather be known as reflecting self because I realize there are, categorically, two different types of thought. A thought can arise intuitively or with more reflective intention, which helps us make clear the difference between the intuitive system and the intellective system in my model. Intuition gains knowledge by externalism, and intellect gains knowledge by internalism. This sounds familiar to the "ideas of reflection" from John Locke in my 31st writing. I think it's also familiar to Daniel Kahneman's thinking fast and slow model. I should look more into that at some point. The reason why I had this confused is because I don't have a lot of intuitive thoughts. I believe my brain abstracts sensory information more visually or tangibly. This is a critical understanding to have if you want to work with your intuitive system. Your brain may abstract imagination differently than others. My brain reflects verbally or abstractly yet intuitively abstracts visually or tangibly (highly simplified). This explains a lot. I've realized that by working on visually reflecting, I have started reflecting with my right hemisphere (I guess?). This is why I believe I possibly hear a buzzing sound in my right side. It is not simply tinnitus, nor does it bother me. It has started occurring at the same time I've been starting to do this, and the more intense the more affective feeling is involved (what I believe is the sense of manifested imagination in our perception). This is also why I feel pure, intentional reflection is special. My right hemisphere has always been active intuitively, but I haven't been using it reflectively, which is required to change the wiring or the imaginary frames my intuitive system is driven by. This is my current understanding from my personal experience. It's not clear to me, but it's a start. There's possibly a lot of emergent behavior that is hard to pinpoint. I believe our reflecting self, in its most pure form, is something very special because it can somehow step out of our manifested imagination / intuitive wiring. It can reflect on it. That's truly remarkable. in neuroscience, I think this reflection part, is known as activity in the default mode network. I'm not entirely sure. I think I'll look into more scientific research later, but I think I'll more easily grasp it after modelling something from reflection and personal experience. This is not really an intellectual investigation for me. Let me try to make it clear what I mean by imagination. Imagination is information. Physical reality is the most tangible or intractable manifestation of imagination, while social reality is a more abstract or malleable manifestation of imagination. This is my current use of the word imagination. I think it's important to recognize that material information and immaterial exist in the same space or system somehow. How far you want to take this, I don't know. One can simply keep it in the context of perception. This means that the wiring in our brain that drives our intuitive system is what I call imagination. On an experiential level, you don't have a sense of a spiritual self in the same manner you do with your acting self or reflecting self. That is because the spiritual self is the infinite potential of imagination or something like that. I believe it doesn't take a physical or mental form, except somehow we can tap into this infinite imagination by some sort of effort, bringing it into existence in some capacity. It's something I wish to investigate further. I have little understanding of this. With my revision of the intellective part of my III model, I'm not fully aware of how our reflecting self relates to imagination as it seems capable of stepping outside frames of imagination. Perhaps it's simply at the edge of unmanifested imagination. However, our intuitive system is driven by manifested imagination. I feel like when I explicitly mention my III model in this writing, I sound like Jack Barker mentioning his conjoined triangles of success, haha. It's just how I write. I'm not obsessed or attached to this model as it may come across. Okay, I'm a bit attached to its name. It fits with the parts (intuition, intellect, imagination), it's the Roman numeral for three, and the letters I are words themselves, you know, I as in referring to myself. You get it, enough of that, heh. I've been using the word affect a bit different here and there. At this time, I see it as some sort of binding force that makes imagination bind or unbind. Erm. I need to think this through more. I forgot the thoughts I had on my walk. Let me talk about my personal experiences instead. I've been meditating a lot more lately (after cultivating a state of mind in peace). I have been taking experiences from my dreams and hallucinations into my meditation practice. I try to follow it, and I seem to trigger responses from my acting self. This may sound weird, but when I'm following this visual thing, I am not in my acting self. It moves on its own as I'm in my reflective self with attention to the imagination that has manifested in me. I guess that makes sense. I won't blame you for thinking I've gone mad. Anyway, my body moves a lot, sometimes trembling, and one time I felt I had to throw up. I think I can more accurately and intellectually understand what triggers me because I can somehow make my manifested imagination apparent with affect. I can't think my way into triggering it (this is also why I couldn't change my imagination verbally. You must have affect to manifest the imagination. I'll probably write more about this later. I guess I'm sort of triggering things in my body by directly firing the visual sensory information binded by it. Interestingly, as I do this, letting it out, negative affect is released, and I sort of realized you can't go crazy triggering all your negatively binded or manifested imagination because you may dissociate. You know you have to bear the negative feeling as it slowly releases (this is why you must be in a good place to do this or you may possibly just add more binding to it, not sure). This must be done very competently. I think this affect can be binded to your bodily imagination / sensory information. I think that's why there's some saying about trauma being stored in your body or something. I have a little grasp of this, but it's a start. I have a lot more to write about, but I'll leave it for now. A quick note is that I think one must understand that your wiring or manifested imagination is bound in surprising ways. I think one must be very competent about this because what I think happens a lot is that people deal with it by building "cheap" imaginations above their unpleasant imagination to keep them safe. This may work for a while, but ultimately, it can lead to bad outcomes in many ways, such as unexplained suffering, conflicting ideas, and unexpected triggering. Okay, bye bye.